Roach?
by Detective Rysposito
Summary: Castle didn't know who these people had been. For all he knew, they could have been coffee-shop workers or business-people. But he knew why they'd been killed. The two men were dead ringers for Ryan and Espo & the woman with a dagger through her heart looked like Ochoa's wife. The killer was a Roach fan & it would only be a matter of time before he went for the genuine article.
1. Chapter 1

Castle hummed happily when he finally got into his writing mood— no writer's block, cases or sexy NYPD detectives to distract him.

Gina had been bugging him for the past few weeks to come up with a draft for his next Nikki Heat novel, so here he was writing to shut her up.

It wasn't like he was ignoring her on purpose (okay, so maybe he was ignoring her on purpose, but definitely not his book). Before he joined the NYPD, he had nothing else other than writing to spend his days, but now he had a family. Not like Alexis and Martha, but the kind that he went out drinking with or paintballing or parties or movie nights. The kind kind of friends that turned into family.

He threw away his days of one night stands and endless hours of writing to pass the time for an actual life. Drinking with the boys, meaningful sex with Beckett and hours of helping at the precinct where he actually felt he was making a difference.

All in all, he'd rather have slower Nikki Heat installments and a family than the opposite.

Castle was actually writing now and with Alexis and Martha away for the weekend, he thought he could finish the draft— that is until his phone rang.

Castle groaned when the beeping of his cell halted his fingers mid-typing and he answered the call from Beckett praying that he wouldn't forget what he was writing after the call. "Beckett!" He whined only half jokingly. "I told you, no body drops for me until I finish this draft. It was your idea!"

Beckett answered without a trace of amusement in her voice, "Castle," Her pause was long enough for Castle to wonder if the call dropped before she continued. "You need to get here. Now."

Castle nodded numbly, pushing from his chair and heading out the door. The Nikki Heat draft already forgotten, "Is everyone okay? Is someone hurt?" He asked urgently as his stomach churned in dozens of different directions at once. He knew that his three friends had a dangerous and life threatening job, but he would never be ready for the call, God forbid anything actually happened.

"We're fine, Castle." She shot off the address where he needed to meet them and then she hung up.

Castle hissed as he slammed the door shut; all possible horrible outcomes playing out in his head.

* * *

><p>Castle hopped out of the cab and was met by Beckett at the police tape. He was relieved to see that Beckett was physically fine and after a quick look around he saw Espo and Ryan interviewing someone, both perfectly healthy.<p>

"What's going on?" Castle asked following Beckett to a beaten down row boat that was carelessly left in the middle of the alleyway.

"Theresa Huller, 32, killed by a dagger in the heart." Beckett gestured to the dead woman lying in the boat.

Castle looked down and then up at Beckett again. He was here no more than five minutes and was already confused. Why was she in a boat in the middle of an alley in New York City? Why did Beckett call Castle in?

Beckett noticed his confusion, "We believe it's another…" Her face screwed up in discomfort at the next word and it's context. "…fan."

Castle did a double take at the woman, her long, thick dark hair that pooled around her head, her dark eyes and darker skin. This Hispanic woman didn't seem to be anybody from his Nikki Heat series.

I don't see it…?" Castle said slowly, not sure if he was missing out on something.

"Neither did we at first, but then we found her I.D." Beckett handed it to Castle and he took it as he read her name crossed out and above was written Sophia Ochoa.

"She was hardly in Heat Rises, and Ochoa isn't even married to her anymore, why…" Before Castle could finish his thought, Beckett handed him something else—this time it was a piece of paper with a message typed.

_Dear Jameson Rook,_

_I am a very big and dear fan of yours. Sometimes it amazes me how I see things that even you don't._

_That`s why I`ll give you a chance, to fix your mistakes._

_It`s good that you got rid of her, it really is. This is just a warning so Ochoa doesn`t decide to settle with her or any girl for that matter. Soon you`ll know why. This will all be smooth sailing if you follow my instructions. _

_But don`t worry, I'll be with you every step of the way to avoid other casualties._

_Yours truly,  
>Captain Roach<em>

After Castle read this letter he looked up in shock at Beckett, "Who the Hell kills an innocent woman for a book?!"

Beckett shook her head, "I don't know, Castle. But we've got nothing at all. No prints, no DNA, nothing."

Castle nodded, but pointed to a spot in the letter, "But he'll keep in touch, maybe just maybe, we can catch him along the way."

Beckett pursed her lips with a short nod as Ryan and Esposito came over discussing something in Ryan's little notepad.

"Anything boys?" Beckett asked with a sigh.

"Nobody saw anything." Ryan said with clear disappointment.

"Did you guys find anything?" Esposito asked curiously with his gaze focused on the note in the writer's hand.

Castle nodded and handed the letter to Esposito and the two detectives read it quietly.

"What the fuck?" Esposito screwed up his face and shoved the letter back in Castle's hands. "I think all the crazies read your books, Castle." He shook his head.

Ryan cleared his throat, "Why did he want to kill Ochoa's wife?" He pointed to the paper in Castle's grip. "More importantly, why does he or she call them self Captain Roach?"

Beckett shrugged her shoulders, "This whole boat and captain thing seems to be a theme, but I don't understand why. Nobody was ever killed like this in any of your books, right Castle?"

He shook his head, rereading the letter again trying to find something they missed.

Ryan interrupted their thoughts when he used his gloved hand to lift the vic's left hand that was folded over her right on her chest. When he removed the bloody hand and slowly placed it next to her, the rest gasped.

On her right hand, her ring finger had been cut off.

Beckett lifted the hand and inspected it before turning to Ryan and Esposito, "I want you two to head back and look up anything you can find about her. Keep an eye out to see if she was married and that's what this is about." She turned her attention from her boys to Castle, "Castle, do you think you can try and figure out why the murderer wrote that letter for you?" Beckett asked as she pulled off her glove.

He nodded, "The Nikki Heat draft can wait…"

She nodded, "Good, I'll show Lanie the missing finger and see what she thinks about the body and then we'll regroup at the murder board in an hour."

"Sounds like a plan, Becks." Esposito mock saluted her before him and his partner headed towards their parked car.

Beckett wished Castle good luck before he left the crime scene to hail down a cab.

* * *

><p>Espo leaned over Ryan's shoulder as they read Theresa's file; she wasn't married, no family in New York and no previous trouble with the law. Her record was clean with nothing pointing out anything to help.<p>

"Well this sucks," Esposito grumbled.

"Maybe we can head to her apartment and see if her neighbors have noticed anything…odd." Ryan turned his head towards his partner as he spoke; their faces were so close their noses touched.

Esposito pushed himself backwards and tried to brush it off as if it was nothing. "So we heading out now?"

Ryan ignored the little spark of electricity he knew that he shouldn't have felt when his very straight partner touched his skin, "Y-yeah, sounds like a plan."

Espo rolled his eyes and grabbed his partner's upper arm, "C'mon, man."

Ryan smiled and nodded once Espo lifted him from his seat and let go. The Irishman watched Espo slip his jacket on and grabbed the directions to her apartment building from the printer.

"Hey Espo…?" Ryan spoke when they were alone in the elevator.

He turned his head to his partner, "Yeah?"

"What…what do you think that 'Captain Roach' thing was about?" He buttoned up his overcoat absently. "Why would this murderer name themselves after us?"

Espo furrowed his eyebrows in thought, "No clue, bro."

"But…they killed an innocent woman that looked like your wife in the book because she was in the way. Something that Castle wrote in the book, this person didn't like and is trying to change his mind." He looked up to see if his partner was following so he could save himself from the awkward finish.

With a sigh of frustration from Espo's obliviousness he continued, "You don't think that maybe he meant Roach…in the romantic way…?" Ryan avoided his partner's glare. "Few months ago when Castle kept sending us those stories and changing our desktop pictures with fanart. There were a lot of terms on those sites. Like two characters are a ship—"

"Bro," Espo cut in as he stared ahead, "Do you know how ridiculous you sound?! All those fanfictions that Castle sent us are exactly that— fiction! Besides Ochoa and Raley aren't us—"

"Technically they are…"

Esposito sighed, "Whatever, bro, just drop it." His expression and voice softened a bit, "Man, just wipe that from your head, okay?"

Ryan stayed quiet for a few minutes before he apologized."Sorry, Javi, just forget I even mentioned anything."

Espo sighed, "I'm not upset at you, Kev, I'm upset that you're right."

"Us together?"

Espo nodded, "That'll make us awkward and everything we do awkward…yeah, we're closer than most partners, but that's okay. And I'm sure as Hell ain't having some crazy person ruin our partnership."

Ryan smiled in relief that his partner didn't think he was that off in his theory, after all Esposito thought it could be that too, but was choosing to ignore it. That didn't mean there wasn't a slight ping in his stomach because of his partner's adverse reaction to the idea of them ever being together.

The rest of the elevator ride and then the drive to the apartment was quiet. Ryan tried not to show his disappointment so Esposito wouldn't get suspicious about any feelings he did or did not feel. Before he knew it, they were outside the apartment heading into the lobby.

"NYPD, Detective Esposito and my partner Detective Ryan." Esposito said to the clerk at the front desk.

"May I help you?" He said slowly eyeing the two.

"Theresa Huller." Ryan said putting his badge back on his hip.

"Yes?" The desk clerk narrowed his eyes.

Esposito and Ryan exchanged looks, "She was…killed last night."

"K-killed?" His expression turned grave.

"Yes, now we would like to ask you a few questions about Ms. Huller if you don't mind." Ryan took out his notebook.

"Of course, of course!" He gestured for them to take a seat at the small love seat inside the small 'employees only room'.

Ryan and Espo followed him and sat across from the clerk. Ryan prepared his pen and notebook as Espo asked the first question. "Was Ms. Huller acting strangely before last night?"

He shook his head, "Not at all, she was just how she always was, ya know?"

"Did she have any enemies?" Esposito leaned forward resting his elbows on his knees.

"Um, not directly, but I mean, she was a big part of this group to protest…same sex marriage." He looked between the two men sitting across from him and quickly added, "She was the only one in this complex who was apart of it, most of us here actually support gay rights." He laughed nervously with a faintly flushed cheeks.

"Oookay…" Esposito shifted uncomfortably, moving away so his shoulder was no longer touching his partner's. The desk clerk must have assumed him and Ryan were more than just partners, Espo thought.

Ryan cleared his throat, "Do you know where she was last night, between the hours of 8 and 11?"

He furrowed his eyebrows, "Actually, I was talking to her friends who usually pick her up for those protests and she was at one yesterday. She is usually back by dinner time, but she didn't return last night. I just assumed she was staying the night with friends." He shrugged his shoulders.

Ryan finished jotting down his notes before asking for the friends' names. "Would you happen to have her friends' names?"

"Stacy and Daniel…I do not know last names, I apologize." He sighed, "But maybe she has something in her apartment…"

Esposito and Ryan nodded. "That would he helpful."

"Very well," He stood up and led them back out into the dingy lobby and down a hall until he stopped in front of room 36A. He pulled out a crowded key ring and unlocked the door before stepping aside and letting the two in. He nodded and seemed to be hesitant to leave. Esposito raised his eyebrows at him so he finally spoke, "Uh, sorry, about before. I didn't mean anything by it. You two…just…I meant nothing by it…"

"No, we're not—" Ryan started to explain, but Esposito interrupted him.

"It's alright, man, really."

He nodded with a nervous smile before heading back down the hall. Esposito and Ryan exchanged glances before Ryan spoke up, "Why does everyone assume we're a thing…weird huh?" He forced a laugh and Espo sighed with a small smile.

"Yeah, can't they see I'm totally out of your league?" Ryan laughed and just like that, the awkwardness washed away.

"You wish," Ryan retorted as he pulled his cell out to call Beckett. "Hey, Beckett, we just talked to the clerk at the hotel and found out she was at a protest against same sex marriage last night."

"Anti-gay rights?"

Ryan nodded and watched as Espo looked through a black phone book on her desk. "Yup, apparently she was very active in that community. Two friends picked her up last night and she never returned."

"Maybe an argument went down last night?"

"Maybe. Espo and I are in her apartment looking for last names for her two friends. Stacy and Daniel…maybe they'll know what happened."

"Sounds like a plan."

"Anything new from Lanie?" Ryan caught Esposito's eyes as he started to motion for Ryan to come by his side. He closed the distance between him and Esposito and read the names he was pointing out, Stacy McGuire andDaniel Nash. Ryan wordlessly handed his notepad to Espo so he could write down their names, numbers and addresses.

"Nothing much, Ry. Castle thinks that the letter was something about you and Espo—sorry, Ochoa and Raley—but we're not sure exactly what."

Ryan eyed his partner quickly and saw that he was busy writing in the notepad to listen, "That's what I said…you know how crazy those fangirlscan be."

Ryan smiled when he heard Beckett laugh, it was the first time since they found the connection to their team that she smiled, "Remember last spring, all that porn that Castle showed you? And I thought there was only that stuff for Hook."

Ryan shared a laugh as well, "Yeah, well, we can't let you two get all the spotlight, now can we?"

"Oh so you do want Castle to give Roach a sex scene…" Ryan could practically hear the smirk in her voice. "He is in the middle of a draft, I'm sure he wouldn't mind changing up the plot."

"God, no, Beckett," He voice was serious even though he was laughing. "Don't say anything to Castle."

Espo slipped the now closed notepad into Ryan's pocket as he gave his partner a confused look.

"Yeah, okay, whatever you say, Ryan."

"Beckett, I mean-" Before he could finish, the sound of whispering and footsteps could be heard from the living room.

Esposito and Ryan froze, both pulling their guns out, "Becks…just give us a minute…" He tossed his phone on the vic's bed after he ended the call; Ryan reminded himself to call Beckett back immediately after they checked it out. Beckett would kill him if she was left hanging, not knowing if her partners were safe or not.

Esposito exited the bedroom first, followed by Ryan. Ryan whispered, "You go through the kitchen, I'll take the door in the hall."

Esposito nodded before they slowly took their positions; exactly in unison moments later, they both entered the small living room yelling "NYPD! Freeze!" cornering the two intruders.

The female squeaked dropping the key ring in her hand. "We're friends!" She nodded at the male by her side.

"Yeah, uh I'm Daniel and this is Stacy, really we weren't breaking in or anything. We swear!" He raised his hands above his head anyway.

Esposito and Ryan exchanged a quick look, using their method of speaking without talking and lowered their guns. "Nash and McGuire?"

The girl was the first to speak up, "Yeah, we just dropped by to check on Tessa, she disappeared last night right after the rally and we haven't heard from her since."

Ryan gulped and tucked his gun back in his holster. "Theresa Huller was…killed last night…"

Daniel spoke first, "Tessa…but…who would kill her?" His wide eyes locked with Esposito's.

"That's what we're trying to figure out, Mr. Nash, if you don't mind us asking a few questions about last night and the hours prior to her death," Espo gestured to the couch.

"O-of course," Stacy mumbled brushing tears out of her eyes. "Anything to help, Detective…?" She smiled weakly.

Esposito smiled back, "Detective Esposito and my partner Detective Ryan."

Daniel let out a brief gasp, "No…Kevin and Javier?"

Esposito snapped his head towards the man and looked at him wide eyed, but said nothing. "Do we know you?"

Stacy cleared her throat, "Dan's coming off a bit creepy…sorry…" She brushed a hair behind her ear with a soft sniffle, "We are big fans of Richard Castle…his Nikki books are our favorites." She shot a glare at Dan possibly for embarrassing her.

"Big Hook fans," Daniel looked at the two excitedly. "Yeah you— I meanRoach have great…uh…you know subtext? I guess? But we're not into that sorta thing." He winced apologetically.

Ryan sighed, "Nothing's there more than being partners—"

Stacy interrupted Ryan and breathed, "Man, if Tessa could meet you guys…well I guess having you investigate her murder would be the next best thing."

The three men gave her a weird look before Espo nodded, "Yeah, anyway, we would like to ask a few questions before we wrap this up."

"Of course." Stacy was back to the tears again.

"Did she make any enemies in these Anti-Gay Rights movements you partook in?"

Dan shook his head, but Stacy placed a hand on his arm, "Well, we've always had our disputes, but never an enemy…arguments stayed on the battlefield per se, but last night, about an hour before we were gonna head to dinner…she was arguing with this man."

This seemed to perk both Ryan and Esposito's interest. "Really?" The Irishman said already furiously scribbling away in his notepad. "Could you describe him for us?"

Stacy nodded and thoughtfully bit her lip before responding, "We're always in fights, it's just a norm during a protest. Usually we brush 'em off, you know, people will have their opinions, but this time it was different." She rubbed her arm idly with a haunted look in her eyes, "The guy threatened her and I told her to ignore him. Who the hell kills somebody for what they believe in?"

"You'll be surprised at all of the reasons people kill each other." Espo sighed before continuing with his questioning, "Now about that man?"

"Oh yeah, um, he's a regular, Brad Heggs. He's always trying for the gay marriage thing." Her face twisted up in disgust at the word.

Ryan nodded, jotting the name down. "Thank you two very much, and we'd appreciate if you don't leave town until we wrap this up in case we have other questions about your friend."

"Of course," Dan nodded in understanding before the four exited the apartment.

On their way to the lobby, Stacy broke the silence, "So…are you twotogether?" Both of the detectives could hear the disgust she tried to hide.

"What?" Ryan shook his head with a sigh, "No! Why does everyone think that?"

For a brief moment, it almost looked like Stacy was disappointed, but she showed her approval with a nod, "Good, that would just ruin the story."

Ryan's nose scrunched up at her insulting comment, but a nudge from his partner made him drop it with a sigh.

"I think Castle's writing already took care of that." Esposito laughed looking at Ryan for a smile. Ryan rolled his eyes with a small smile before waving goodbye to the victim's friends.

Ryan didn't even bother trying to get to the car first, he learned after the first dozen races or so that even if he did beat Esposito, he wouldn't be allowed to drive. Esposito drove and he sat shotgun.

"Don't forget to call Beckett, she's probably pacing the bullpen pulling her hair out in worry right now." Esposito said as he stuck the key into their car's ignition.

Ryan already had his phone out, "Although I'd love to see that, you're probably right and then she'd flip out on us when we got back." He smiled as he heard his partner laugh in agreement before dialing Beckett's number.

* * *

><p>"I'm sure they're perfectly okay, Beckett. We didn't get any calls over the radio. They'll be okay." Castle rubbed her arm as they sat together in the breakroom waiting for one of the boys to call back.<p>

"Fifteen minutes ago they hung up, Castle, they know the rules. They call back as soon as possible."

"Maybe— " Just as Castle tried to come up with something else to keep her mind off of the boys' welfare, her phone rang.

Her hand ripped it off the table and she practically stabbed the screen with her finger to answer Ryan's call. She didn't even give him a chance to explain himself before she yelled, "Kevin Patrick Ryan! Just what the hell do you think you're doing not calling me back? That was a half and hour ago!"

Castle flinched in his seat and could imagine Ryan pulling the phone away from his ear as their superior scolded him. He waved his hand for Beckett to switch the call to speaker phone letting Castle hear Ryan mid-apology, "I'm sorry, Beckett, I called when I could. It was just the vic's friends, Stacy McGuire and Dan Nash."

"Next time call right away, with the team's connection to this case I really don't want to risk anything." She finally took a seat next to Castle now that she knew her boys were safe.

"Understand." Beckett heard Ryan and knew he was truly sorry for worrying her, but that didn't take back the gray hair she now had. She looked over at Castle when she noticed he was uncharastically quiet; he was staring down at the table with furrowed eyebrows.

"Castle, what's— "

"Stacy McGuire, that name sounds familiar." Castle said more to himself than anyone else.

"She's a fan of yours, Castle." Ryan's laugh bubbled through the speaker, "Doesn't like Roach too much, though. She said if Raley and Ochoa were together it would ruin the story."

Ryan must have had his phone on speaker as well because Esposito cut in, "Don't worry, man, I told her our writing already ruined it."

"Ha ha," Castle said sarcastically, "Thanks a lot, 'Sito."

"Anyway," Ryan said getting back to work, "We've got a name, Brad Heggs, he was seen arguing with the vic last night at a protest."

Beckett nodded, "Anybody else?"

"Not that Nash or McGuire knew." Esposito noted, "I guess this Heggs kid is our one lead right now."

"I'll bring him in to see what we can learn." Beckett was already getting ready to run his name through the system.

"Great, we should be back within a few minutes." Ryan said before hanging up.

Beckett pocketed her phone and headed towards the door leading into the bullpen, "C'mon Castle, we've got a murder to solve.

Standing up to follow the detective out the door, he still couldn't shake the feeling that he had definitely heard her name before…but where?


	2. Chapter 2

Beckett bit her nail as she stared at the murder board rereading the notes she just finished writing. All they had up there was a picture of Theresa Huller and the letter from 'Captain Roach'. She capped the marker satisfied with what they had.

She hated when there was a dead end on her board, but thankfully right now they had a possible lead with Brad Heggs. Once Ryan came back with his information, they'd bring him in for questioning and then either find their murderer or another dead end.

Castle hadn't even opened his mouth about conspiracy theories or blood sucking ninjas and for that Beckett was grateful. This case was too personal to be making any jokes about. Thankfully he was too busy at her desk foraging through past fan mail letters. He was putting any letters that mentioned Ryan and Esposito's characters to the side.

Esposito was reading them as the pile steadily grew. His face remained blank most of the time, but a few times he snorted or shifted uncomfortably. "Uh, Castle, please tell me you didn't finish reading this one."

Castle paused his paper rustling to look at the letter that Espo was holding towards him. He laughed when he saw which letter made the detective so uneasy, "Of course, Espo, I think that's my favorite."

Esposito made a face looking back down at the letter that was pretty much porn between Raley and Ochoa. "Don't they usually post this crap on your fansites? Not send it to the author."

Castle shrugged his shoulders, adding another letter to the pile, "Sometimes I get 'em. Not complaining, though, they are very _skin tingling_." He teased.

Esposito huffed, "That is disgusting; what Raley and Ochoa do aren't anyone's business. So what if maybe they love each other and they're guys. I don't know why everyone gets their panties in a twist about it." He let the letter fall back into the pile.

Castle eyed him as he pointed out, "Espo, Raley and Ochoa are book characters."

"Yeah, well you based them off of me and Ry-" Espo realized he had told Ryan only hours earlier not to think like that and shut up.

Castle shared an amused smile with Beckett before turning his chair to face Esposito, "What was that, Esposito?"

Esposito shook his head and quickly stood up, "Nothing, just get back to your letter sorting." He mumbled before excusing himself to the breakroom.

Once he was gone, Castle laughed and turned to Beckett, "Isn't he cute when he gets all touchy-feelsy?"

Beckett slapped him upside the head, and Castle immediately whined, "Ow. What was that for?"

"How many times do I have to tell you to leave them alone to figure it out on their own?"

Castle rolled his eyes, "I'll be in a grave by the time Esposito actually admits his feelings. You know that just as much as I do." He went back to searching his letters from any indications of a possible suspect.

"Let them do it own their own time, Castle." Beckett turned to the whiteboard to read over the details they had for the dozenth time.

* * *

><p>Esposito paced around the break room cracking his knuckles out of nervous habit. He <em>despised <em>this case already and they weren't even a day into it.

All of this Roach crap was striking a match that Espo preferred to stay unlit. Or maybe that was just what he wanted to believe. He really wasn't so sure of anything right now.

Sure, he loved Ryan; he was his partner. He loved Beckett and Castle as well...so why should Ryan be any different?

Esposito shook his head, he wasn't. He was just like anybody else that Espo cared for. No difference; this case was only getting to him- that's all.

He wiped his hands absently on his pant legs as he continued to tell himself that he loved his partner, but he was not _in love _with him. Big difference.

He let out a shaky breath and turned around to head back into the bullpen just in time to see Ryan come rushing towards Castle and Beckett. With that smile and his eyes and his hair and the way he gets so excited when he finds a lead - _holy hell_.

Esposito fell into the couch when his heart stopped beating altogether. Was he really thinking those things about his partner? Esposito let out a strangled sigh in realization, "I love him."

* * *

><p>A few minutes later, Ryan came bounding around the corner of the bullpen with a few sheets of paper in his hand. "I got Hegg's info. He works Downtown in a small bakery."<p>

Beckett smiled, thankful that they were beginning to get somewhere. She hated when her case was frozen so this was definitely good news. "Let's get on that; sooner we do, the sooner we can figure this out."

Ryan did a quick 360 sweep of the bullpen, "Where's Javi? I was gonna take him to come and pick up Heggs."

Castle jumped up from his chair, "I'll come, Espo wasn't feeling too well before. And please, I need a break from all this letter sorting."

Ryan didn't seem to notice anything weird about the writer's actions and shrugged his shoulders, "Sure, Castle, I don't mind. As long as Beckett can spare you."

Beckett waved her hand towards the two, "Go ahead, I'll sort through what Castle has picked out and see if any of these match up to the letter left at the scene." She rolled her eyes at the looks that Castle and Ryan were giving her, "I know, it's a long shot, but we don't have much to go on."

Ryan agreed with a laugh, "Don't we know it." He shook his head about to exit the bullpen with Castle but before leaving for the elevator he said, "If Javi comes back, tell him I went to pick up Heggs and if his migraines are acting up I have a bottle of ibuprofen in my desk."

Castle bit his lip to stop his laugh from coming out as he followed Ryan's now retreating form to the elevator. Castle always assumed that Esposito was the mother hen, but he supposed that Ryan could play the card just as well.

The two were quiet through the rest of the precinct and half the car ride. Castle figured that this would be one of his only shots to see what Ryan thought about all of this. Screw Beckett's notion to leave the two doofuses to figure it all out on their own.

"So, Ryan how are you doing?"

Ryan turned away from the road for a quick second to give Castle a confused look, "Umm, considering?"

Castle rolled his eyes, "All this Roach stuff, doy."

Something flashed in Ryan's eyes but he brushed it off a second later, "Nothing. I mean it's a little spooky having some psycho out there killing because of me and Javi's counterparts, but I'll get through it."

Castle shook his head with a 'tsk', "That's not what I was referring to and we both know it."

Ryan's grip tightened on the wheel as he said, "Castle, I have no clue what on earth you're talking about. Raley and Ochoa's feelings are different for each other than me and Javi's."

Castle stayed silent for a moment before he said quietly, "I didn't mention anything about feelings, Kevin."

Ryan cursed under his breath slamming his fist against the wheel after he stopped for a red light, "Castle, it's nothing really."

Castle disagreed, "Doesn't seem like nothing." He looked over at Ryan and eyed him closely even though the detective refused to look over at him, "I know how you feel. It's okay."

Ryan rolled his eyes as he started the car back up, "Castle, he's my partner. Maybe in your books you can create relationships and feelings between two people, but not in real life."

Castle nodded, giving him that much, "You're right, I can't control how you and Espo feel...you two managed that all on your own."

"Castle-" Ryan warned, but the writer interrupted him.

"I see it, Ry. The way you smile at him. Every time you read a _Heat _draft you're always mesmerized by Ochoa and Raley's relationship because you're too afraid to admit it out loud, but seeing you and Esposito together, even if not really you, gives you hope."

Castle remained quiet, allowing Ryan to digest what he said. The Irishman kept his lips in a tight line up until they pulled in front of the bakery, "What if you're right, Castle?"

Castle was surprised to hear those words leave Ryan's mouth. Castle had a dozen other examples to prove that Ryan and Espo both loved each other, expecting to hear more refusal. "What's wrong with that?"

"It's wrong." Since Ryan no longer had the steering wheel to control, he busied his hands with playing with sweater.

"Says who?" Castle narrowed his eyes, "I don't see anything wrong with being in love with him, Kevin."

Ryan flinched slightly, but avoided the questions, "It'll ruin our partnership."

"Even if Espo didn't feel the same, I doubt he'd throw you to the curb for loving him." Castle rubbed Ryan's arm comfortingly.

Finally Ryan turned and made eye contact with Castle, "I can't Castle. Thank you for trying- I really do appreciate it- but I can't risk our friendship for my feelings. I can live with being in love with him, but staying a friend. I couldn't live with my myself being in love with him, but being booted from his life." And with that, he exited the car before Castle could say anything else.

Castle's heart truly heart for the Irishman; he obviously loved his partner but was keeping it quiet. All because he was afraid to lose him. In Ryan's mind it was a brutal catch 22. But Castle knew there was hope if only he could get Ryan to see it.

* * *

><p>By the time Castle and Ryan returned with Brad Heggs in custody, Beckett and Esposito were going crazy with no leads. Beckett lead Heggs into the nearest interrogation room with Ryan. Castle and Esposito slid into the viewing room.<p>

Beckett took the seat next to Ryan and across from Heggs. "Bradley Heggs."

The young man nodded once, "Yes," He shifted uneasily in his seat, "Did I do something wrong?"

Ryan pretended to read through his notes, "Last night you attended a LGBT protest, correct?"

"Yes." He answered simply.

"Did you happen to encounter a young woman by the name Theresa Huller?" Ryan slid a picture of the woman across the table.

Heggs' confusion disappeared when he saw her face, "_Her? _Unfortunately, yes." The looks from Ryan and Beckett made him explain himself more, "We don't see eye to eye, obviously. She's always popping up at our events and shoving her crap down our throats. I usually ignore her because there's people like her everywhere, but yesterday she really pissed me off."

Ryan and Beckett exchanged a hopeful look, "What exactly did she do that got you so upset, Brad?" Beckett asked.

Their suspect huffed, "That bitch had the nerve to come up to me and my boyfriend and start spewing her, 'God hates faggots' crap. _I _wanted to punch that woman right in the face, but Kyle kept my cool."

"Was that it?" Ryan wondered.

Heggs shook his head, "No, I'm used to that from her. It was when she had the nerve to dump her damn coffee all over Kyle's arm; stained through his button down and burnt his arm." He waved his arm, "That's when I started blowing smoke at her until her friends dragged her off. Most likely so I couldn't get her i trouble for burning my boyfriend. She's just lucky Kyle didn't want to press charges."

Ryan cleared his throat once Heggs stopped his rambling, "Theresa Huller was killed last night, Brad."

Heggs eyes widened, "_Killed _like _murdered_?"

Beckett nodded her head and said, "Mr. Heggs, where were you last night between 2 and 4?"

Heggs seemed too shocked to speak but gathered his words, "Wait- _you think I killed her?"_

Beckett sighed, "We have to check out every possible angle, I hope you understand."

"I was at my apartment with Kyle, we only returned from the hospital at 12:30. You can check with our doctor and our building's security tapes. I didn't kill her, I swear."

* * *

><p>Right as Ryan and Beckett exited the room, Castle was ontop of them, "Do we believe his story?"<p>

Beckett eased Castle to the side so her and Ryan could get through, "As of now, we can't be too sure, but I'm almost positive he's innocent."

Ryan nodded in agreement, "I seriously doubt he'd kill a woman like that because she spilt coffee on his boyfriend. And I wasn't getting the 'creepy Castle fan' vibe."

Esposito laughed, "You know what they say, bro, takes one to know one."

Ryan shoved his partner with a sarcastic laugh to the side before heading to his desk, "I'm going to call the hospital and then his apartment building to see if his alibi checks out."

The rest of the tam followed Ryan towards their cluster of desks. Beckett huffed a sigh, "Which it most likely will so I guess we're back to the drawing boards. There's noth-"

She was interrupted by Gates calling Castle's name from her spot next to a delivery man that must have just stepped out of the elevator. Castle shared a worried look to Beckett before he slowly approached Gates.

"Yes, sir?"

"There seems to be a letter for you with no return address." Gates was just as suspicious of the letter as Beckett and Castle were.

Castle nodded and took the letter from the man and walked back to his team with the envelope gripped tightly between his fingers. The rest stopped what they were doing to see Castle's return.

Knowing that the team's, plus Gates' gazes were on him he opened the letter carefully and pulled out the letter and read it outloud,

"_Dear Mr. Rook,_

"_I hope that you understand why that woman was killed. And just what exactly I'm hoping to achieve. _

"_But the two most important people in this plan still do not understand. They're in denial. I know._

"_This will not do, so I'll leave a present soon to change their minds. _

"_With pleasure,_

"_Captain Roach"_

Castle finished reading the letter and gulped thickly looking up at the group.

Beckett narrowed her eyes at the letter, "We find this person _now_. They're going to kill more people and damn it, we can't let that happen."


	3. Chapter 3

"_Why are you doing this?" The blue eyed man begged at his captor's feet._

_The woman smiled looking down at the beaten man, he was nameless to her. Just someone who happened to look exactly like one of the boys she wanted. "You must understand."_

"_Understand what?" He sobbed moving away the other beaten man next to him. "I don't know him...I don't want to…"_

_The Hispanic man besides him agreed, "I'm not even gay." He turned to the blue eyed man and added, "No offense, man."_

"_I'm not gay either!" He sputtered, "This is ridiculous, really. Just let us go." _

_The woman shook her head, "Do you really think that's how this is going to play out?" She smirked, "You two wouldn't be my first kill and if the two that I am sending this message to don't understand...well, you certainly won't be my last either."_

_The blue eyed man laughed nervously, "Maybe, you should try a more normal method of communication. They'll understand your message I'm sure if you just called them or maybe shot them an email."_

_The woman tightened her grip on the whip in her hand, "No, they wouldn't. Now, _fuck or die_."_

* * *

><p>"This is crazy." Esposito muttered staring down at Castle's newest note. "This creep is grade A, bat-shit crazy."<p>

Castle rolled his eyes, "Thanks for noticing, Esposito."

"And there was no return address or prints?" Ryan asked taking the note from his partner's hands.

"Nada," Castle sighed, "This is creepy. I have no clue what the hell this person wants!" He ran a hand through his hair with a frustrated sigh.

"Apparently it has to do with two people that need to do something…?" Esposito shrugged his shoulders, returning the letter to Castle.

"Hey," Ryan perked up in his seat, "Maybe they're referring to characters in your books. She expects you to be able to control them so it's probably that."

"Well, it would be a little easier if they told me what the hell I'm supposed to write for who before killing people!" Castle threw his hands up in the air getting upset.

Beckett rubbed his shoulder, "You know this isn't your fault, right?"

Castle sighed, "Maybe if I had done something differently, this person wouldn't be so upset right now."

Beckett swiveled the writer's chair so he was facing her, "Castle, look at me when I tell you that this is not your fault in the slightest way. This person is obviously unstable, do you understand me?"

Castle nodded heavily, but he put the letter in Beckett's hands for her to take to evidence. She nodded a thanks, "I'm gonna have Ronnie check this in and then we'll start our next plan of action...I still think her two friends know more. Right now with them being the only people to have actually seen our vic _that we know of_, I'd like to keep an eye out on them."

"We could call her in or go check up on her." Esposito said leaning back in his chair.

Beckett thought on that for a moment before waving her hand, "Call her in, I really don't know what this person wants, but they're targeting our team so I'd like to stay in as much as possible."

Esposito rolled his eyes, "Beckett, we are trained police officers...plus a writer...I don't think we need to be hiding in here. We haven't even been threatened yet."

Beckett pointed her finger, "_Yet! _See, better safe than sorry." When she saw Epso about to argue again she waved her hand, "Nu-uh, I don't want to hear any more from you. Just call them down."

As she walked away, was already on the computer pulling up both Stacy McGuire and Daniel Nash's contact information. In a little under an hour, he had both of them coming to the precinct as soon as they could.

"So, Espo," Castle said as they waited for them to arrive. "You at least read some of the _Nikki Heat _books, right?"

Esposito eyed him carefully for a moment until he answered, "I've read 'em all, Castle."

Castle grinned and cast a look towards Ryan before he continued, "How come you don't have as many comments as Ryan does?"

"_Castle._" Ryan warned with a glare before the writer took it too far.

Esposito barely gave his partner a glance before he responded, "Because Castle, they're good books, but I'm not about to go physco fan on you." He quickly added, "No offense, Kevin."

Ryan smiled, "None taken." Before he turned back to Castle and shook his head. When he was sure that he caught Castle's attention, he mouthed, '_Don't you dare.'_

Castle winked and went on, "Ryan doesn't seem to want to shut up. Especially about Raley and Ochoa."

It slid right over Esposito's head as Castle tried to drop hints. He only thought that Castle was teasing the Irishman. "They are us. Is he supposed to go on and on about you and Becks?" He pulled a face with a shake of his head.

Ryan's ears perked up, "I thought you said they weren't us, Javi?"

Esposito looked flustered as he attempted to turn his head away quickly, but refused to answer his partner's question. Ryan smiled and scooted his chair closer to Esposito's, "It's okay, Javi, you can admit that you think they're us, too."

Esposito rolled his eyes and pushed Ryan's chair back to his desk, "Stop being a dork, Ryan and get back to work."

"We're waiting on Nash and McGuire. And your confession." Ryan added with a small smirk.

Esposito huffed glaring at Castle, "See what you've done? You blew on the flame and now he will not shut up until he gets what he wants. Great job."

Castle was having too much fun with this, "I see he's really got you wrapped around his finger."

Esposito shook his head, "That is wrong, we all know that _Ryan _would be the whipped one in our relationship." He noticed what he said a little too late, "Our very _platonic _relationship, that is."

Castle laughed and slapped his palm against his thigh, "You two are the cutest."

Ryan smiled softly with a laugh and watched as Esposito was flustered all over again. He clasped his hand on his partner's shoulder. "We get that a lot, don't we, honey?"

Esposito was shoved deeper into embarrassment when he heard the clearing of a throat followed by a woman's voice, "I'm sorry, are we interrupting something?"

The three boys turned quickly to the source of the sound and saw Stacy and Daniel. Stacy eyed Ryan's hand on Esposito's bicep and pulled it away. Her eyes moved from his hand to his eyes and he was waiting for her nod of approval, but he almost felt like she was upset with him.

"Uhh, no, come with us and answer a few more questions we have."

Stacy straightened herself out and directed her attention from Ryan to Esposito, "Of course, Detectives."

Beckett walked back just in time, "We're sorry to bother you again, we have just a few more questions. Castle and myself will take one of you and Detectives Ryan and Esposito will take the other."

Stacy spoke up first before Beckett even had a chance to say another word, "I'll go with Roach."

They all gave her a weird look, so she shook her head and corrected herself, "Sorry, I meant Detectives Ryan and Esposito."

Esposito looked over at Beckett, silently begging for her to not leave them alone with this girl, but she ignored it with a smile, "Then Mr. Nash if you don't mind following Castle and myself."

He nodded and followed the two. Ryan and Esposito glared over at Castle when he winked at them before sauntering away. If Stacy noticed, she didn't say anything as she smiled widely at the two detectives besides her.

Esposito sighed and extended his arm towards the closest interrogation room. "Let's just get a few questions straightened out, Ms. McGuire and then we'll let you go."

A few minutes later, Ryan and Esposito found themselves sitting across a wary looking Stacy as she fidgeted in her seat.

"I'm sorry," She broke the silence, "Did I do something? Why am I in here?"

Ryan shook his head with a soft smile, "No, but we have to separate you and Mr. Nash as we conduct our questioning and they have the room."

Stacy visibly relaxed, "Go ahead,"

Esposito pulled a few papers in front of him and started the questioning to get this over with, "We talked with Brad Heggs and he made it clear that he was in the hospital with his boyfriend when Ms. Huller was murdered. A visit to tend to the burns caused by her."

Stacy shrugged her shoulders as if burning someone was as casual as brushing your teeth in the morning, "So? Those two were always at each other's throats."

Ryan sighs, "Why? So you both have your opinions, why can't you just let the other be?"

Stacy eyed him and after a moment of hesitation said, "It's not that simple, Detective. Sometimes things don't work out with _talking _or _ignoring. _Without a little force, nothing would get done in this world."

"And it turns out force like that is what got Ms. Huller killed." Esposito said flatly.

Stacy turned to him, "Then why are you questioning me instead of trying to find her killer?"

"Our only lead turned out to be a dead end." Ryan explained, "We need anything else you can tell us to help find her real killer."

Esposito continued his partner's train of thought, "There's been a few things popping up in this case that all relate to Richard Castle's _Nikki Heat _series. Is there anyone that she got into disagreements about the book with? No matter how small."

Stacy bit her lip in thought before shaking her head, "Not that I know of, sorry. Why? What kind of _Nikki Heat _things?"

Esposito and Ryan shared a look, conducting one of their many no-words-conversations. How much should they tell her? What could they even trust her with? They were midst trying to decided when their guest giggled. Both Ryan and Esposito's head snapped to face her.

"Hmph," She covered her mouth quickly, "I'm sorry- it's just that you guys act so much like Raley and Ochoa. I mean, it's perfect parallels between you guys. Mr. Castle did a great job."

Espo cleared his throat awkwardly, "Yes, well, that's actually part of the problem."

Stacy's smile faltered, "I'm afraid I don't understand…"

"You know that Roach crap you were talking about? Some people take it to a whole new level of creepy." Esposito explained. "They don't understand the difference between real life and fantasy."

Stacy's eyebrows furrowed, "What? You two are together?"

Esposito's eyes widened. How did she get that from what he said? "No!" He was getting tired of explaining him and his partner's relationship to people. If they weren't a thing, so what? If they were, that was no ones business. Not that they were at all. He shoved any thought like that out of his head. "Neither are Raley and Ochoa."

She nodded slowly, "You never know…" She bit her lip trying to figure out if she should continue on. In the end, she decided to, "So you two aren't planning together? Is that what this killer wants?"

Ryan's face scrunched in confusion, "We're not sure...but we're not going to _get together_ because some freak wants us to." He used air quotes around the words, 'get together'.

Stacy looked surprised and even a bit angry, "So you're saying that you'll let more people get killed before you do what they want?"

Espo glared at her, "We're not _letting people die_. We don't even know what they want. Why do you sound so sure that it has something to do with my partner and I's relationship? You seem so adamant on us getting together when not only days ago you were at an anti-gay rights protest and seem to be active in the community."

Stacy's form straightened and her lips tightened as if she'd be caught in a lie. "I'm sorry for doing _your _job and finding my friend's killer. I think I can get over something as small as sexuality when it comes to solving a murder."

Esposito huffed, "Oh, but any other time you can't stand the thought of a man loving another man or two women kissing, huh?" He didn't mean to snap at her, but she was on his last nerve. He acknowledged Ryan's steadying grip on his arm and let his shoulders sag. "I apologize."

Stacy waved her hand, "It's okay, I shouldn't have said what I said." She shifted uncomfortably in her seat, "Is that all? Can I go now?"

Ryan sighed with a nod, "If anything comes up that you forgot, please don't hesitate to let us know."

She smiled carefully as she stood up, "Of course...and I'm really sorry again. I was out of line before."

Esposito stood up to open the door for her, "Don't worry about it. I know how hard it must be to have lost a friend. We're doing everything we can to find this person."

Stacy threw the two a soft smile before exiting the room and heading out of the bullpen. Once she was out, her smile disappeared. She thought they'd understand by now. But it seems like she'll have to send them the present since they can't take a hint.

* * *

><p>"Mr. Nash, we're sorry to bother you again, but we have just a few more questions." Beckett said as she sat across from the man with Castle by her side.<p>

He nodded his head and got comfortable, "Whatever I can do to help."

Beckett smiled, glad to have his cooperation and he didn't get too annoyed at being called into the precinct again like many people have in the past. She only hoped that the other friend was being as cooperative for Ryan and Esposito. "Well, it turns out that Brad Heggs has a tight alibi of being in the hospital to treat burns on his boyfriend's arms after Ms. Huller spilt her coffee on him."

"I didn't think it was him anyway." Daniel shrugged his shoulders.

Castle leaned forward, "Why would you say that?"

"Theresa is - _was_ - my best friend, but she could get a little overboard with her protesting. Brad isn't a very violent person. I don't think he could stomach killing anybody." He held his hands up, "I don't hate the guy, I just hate what he believes in."

"Do you know of anyone that might have ever gotten into an argument with her over my books?" Castle asked, brushing off Daniel's last answer.

"You'd probably have a better time asking Stace that, she was into the books longer. I mean, sure I read them, but it was Stacy that introduced us to them. We kinda bonded from their and then Stacy joined us during protests."

"When did she first get you guys into the books?" Beckett asked curiously.

Daniel shrugged his shoulders, "Not long ago. We only met her like a month or two ago."

Castle's eyebrows furrowed, "How did you three meet?"

"Me and Theresa met Stacy one day when we were out at lunch. She came up to us explaining that she was new here and wanted some tips for good restaurants and stuff. We kinda just clicked."

Beckett finished jotting down her notes before looking up from her notebook with a smile, "Thank you for your time, Mr. Nash. I think we have everything we can get."

He smiled before showing himself to the door and leaving Beckett and Castle to talk. Beckett spoke first, "That didn't give us much." She said gloomily.

Castle sighed, "Hopefully Ryan and Esposito got something from Stacy...something isn't setting right with me."

Beckett laughed, "Maybe it's the fact that she's against gays, but has a weird obsession with Ryan and Esposito being together."

Castle shook his head, "I've heard her name before, Beckett. I just cannot remember where. I really don't think she was new to the city only a few months ago." He groaned and pulled at his hair, "It's driving me crazy, Beckett!"

Beckett rolled her eyes, "Calm down, Castle."

He crossed his arms over his chest with a mock pout, "Easy for you to say. Her name isn't driving you insane."

Beckett pecked his cheek chastely before going to leave the room, "Hate to break it to you, babe, but you're past insane."

Castle's upper lip hitched as he mumbled under his breath.

Beckett's head popped back in the doorway, "What was that, _Rick_?" She batted her eyelashes, feigning innocence.

Castle immediately shut up, "Nothing."

"That's good. Now get your ass out here so we can solve this case."

Castle sighed and pushed himself up from his seat, "Yes, _Dear_."

* * *

><p>"<em>They don't understand!" She roared raising her arm and bringing the whip across the smaller man's thighs. "Why don't they understand?!" Another whip.<em>

_The man couldn't help the scream that tore through his throat. His wrists were handcuffed to the bed headboard and his ankles were handcuffed to the foot board. That meant he couldn't cover himself after she had all but ripped his clothes off. He was long past embarrassed, having been tied down to the bed naked next to the other man for a little more than a day now. _

_After a call yesterday, their captor left for a few hours hopeful, but came back with steam puffing from her ears. She had barely stopped the beatings since. _

"_Maybe because you're a fucking crazy hag!" The Hispanic man besides him yelled. _

_The woman thankfully lowered her weapon and caught both of their eyes watching as they both shook in their restraints. She smiled feeling satisfied that they knew who was in charge here; who controlled who. That's the way it had to be or else it wouldn't work._

_She dropped the whip to the floor with a content hum, "I am not crazy."_

"_Oh," The blue eyed man coughed weakly. "So everyone beats two naked men when they refuse to have sex." _

_Her smile disappeared as she growled, "If you would just follow my bidding than you two would not be going through this."_

_Both of them rolled their eyes. The Hispanic man huffed, "Maybe if I actually cared for him that way I'd have sex with him."_

"_And I have a girlfriend," The other pointed out. "We both have a family. Please let us go back to them, we won't even press charges." His heart twisted in his chest at the thought of his girlfriend of three years most likely having a cow searching for him. He almost cried at the thought of the look on his mother's face when they found his naked body beaten in a bed next to a just as beaten and naked stranger. His kid sister would never get over the fact that her big brother was murdered - never able to take her to dance or a concert again. _"Please."

"_I'll give you one last chance."_

_The two men exchanged a last look because both knew that neither would give in. The blue eyed man gave a shaky smile to the other as a goodbye (being tied up with someone for almost 48 hours is a great way to form a bond. A very weird, fucked up bond, but a bond none the less). He cleared his throat looking back up at the crazy woman looming over them, "I guess this is it, then. You might as well just get it over with."_

_The woman smiled before bending down to pick up her whip._

* * *

><p>Beckett groaned in frustration after they compared their questionings, "So basically we have nothing new?"<p>

Esposito sighed, "Not really, unless you count Stacy's weird obsession with me and Kevin."

Castle grinned with a wink, "You two or Roach. _Oh, _that's right, there's not much of a difference."

Espo narrowed his eyes and turned to Beckett, "If you don't shut your boy up, _I will_."

Beckett rubbed Esposito's arm fondly, "He's just teasing, Espo. You know how toddlers are - they're always craving attention."

Castle crossed his arms over his chest, "Hey!"

Beckett smiled at him with a look that said, 'Who? Me?'

Ryan watched his team exchange the banter back and forth until he realized that it could just about go on forever. He cleared his throat and said, "There's actually a thing or two that I wanted to run past you guys...but I think we should do that over dinner." The Irishman looked down at his wrist to check the time.

Castle's face brightened at Ryan's words, "Ohh, I've got a hankering for Chinese. Let's go, Spud."

Ryan's face wrinkled in distaste of the slur, but didn't bother mentioning it since Castle would just shot back another leprechaun name instead. "I guess I'm taking him along." He brushed Castle's hand off his arm.

"We'll be right back, beautiful." Castle smiled and dropped a kiss to Beckett's cheek before turning to face Ryan and follow him out.

Esposito looked over at his partner with a mock-pout, "Where's my goodbye kiss?" He was too busy smiling at Castle because he thought he won that round of teasing Ryan. So he was surprised when he felt Ryan's lips smack loudly against his cheek. Esposito turned to stare at his smirking partner. "_Ugh, _you got your slobber on me." He wiped his cheek with the back of his head, but he couldn't hide the blush rising to his cheeks.

Ryan smiled and Esposito was glad to see him turn around to exit the bullpen with Castle so that he didn't have to see the deep red his cheeks probably were right now. He wasn't supposed to feel that spark when his partner _jokingly _kissed his cheek. It wasn't even a kiss, it was more of Ryan pressing his wet lips against his cheek just to bug him. But, the more Esposito tried to tell himself he _definitely _didn't feel anything for his partner, the less he believed it.

Ryan didn't turn back around until he entered the elevator with Castle by his side. He pretended not to notice that his partner's cheek were still tinged pink. He only turned away from his partner when he felt an elbow nudge his arm.

"Finally making a move, huh?" Castle grinned cheekily watching as a faint blush now rose to the Irishman's cheeks.

"One of us has to." Ryan grumbled choosing to stare at the elevator buttons instead of the writer. "It wasn't even serious, don't get excited."

Castle shrugged his shoulders, "I don't know. He seemed pretty serious to me."

"I'm not getting into this again, Castle." Ryan said when the elevator dinged signalling its arrival at the ground floor. He walked out of the precinct with Castle following close behind to his car.

"Come on, I know you both feel the same. Don't just let him slip through your fingers!" Castle plopped himself in the shotgun seat.

"_Castle,_" Ryan started to warn him, but Castle waved his hand to silence him.

"If you're not going to do it for your or Espo's sake, please do it for Beckett and mine. We can only take so much sexual tension before we want to jump off the Brooklyn Bridge." Castle looked over at him with raised eyebrows.

Ryan mirrored his look, "There is no sexual tension between me and Javi."

Castle let his hands fall to his thighs with a slap, "_Oh really? _Then what would you call your constant eye sex?"

Ryan pretended to think before answering, "Hmm, non-existent."

Castle gave a loud laugh, but purposely died down when he looked back at Ryan, "You were being serious?"

"Yes, I was being serious." He made a face ahead of him, figuring he shouldn't risk a car accident just to turn to the writer.

Castle quickly pulled himself together, "Well, so was I." He smiled and turned to face his friend, "You'll both be six feet under if we keep going at your pace."

Ryan wrinkled his nose, "No, Castle. I'm not going to make myself look like an idiot because you made me tell him something that I'm not ready for yet."

"Ah ha!" Castle's sudden yell startled Ryan, but thankfully he was pulling up in front of the Chinese place and not in the middle of the road.

"Castle, what the hell?" Ryan asked looking at the man hesitantly shutting the car off as Castle continued to smirk.

"You admitted that you love him, _again_." He seemed proud of himself for some reason. "And I know how to help you." Ryan nodded waiting for him to continue, so he did. "I'll pretend to be Esposito, and you be, well, you."

Ryan groaned as he leaned against the seat, "Castle, that's the stupidest thing I've heard. No thank you."

"Don't be such a Debbie Downer, c'mon, it'll help." Castle pouted and nudged Ryan's shoulder again.

Ryan peeked an eye over at Castle to see him giving him, swear to God, _puppy dog eyes_. "Castle, you're a little too old for pouting, don't you think?"

"And you two are too old to be living through your little crushes!" Castle retorted, keeping Ryan's eye contact.

Ryan pitched his nose, "Okay...if I admit to _maybe _liking Javier a bit more than a partner should, will you leave me alone?"

Castle shook his head, "Nope, because I already know you love him. I need you to tell him."

Ryan stayed silent and let Castle's words seep into his brain, especially how casual Castle had used the word love to describe his feelings for his partner. He weighed through the pros and cons in his mind. The worst possibility was that Javier was disgusted with him and never wanted to see him again, but the best outcome was that Javier felt the same and he finally got to hold him the way he's wanted to for years.

And maybe it was the thought of kissing Javier. Or maybe it was the thought of being together with Javier forever. Or maybe it was Castle's puppy dog pout. Whatever the reason, Ryan found himself agreeing with a sigh, "Okay, fine, but only once."

Castle was excited, "Yes!" He turned in his seat so he was fully facing Ryan, "I'll start off okay and you just say what you feel. It's that easy."

Ryan bit back his sarcastic remark on why if it was so easy, did him and Beckett dance around each other for years? Castle was only trying to help and Ryan was actually more than thankful for him. He sighed, but nodded his head, "Alright, I'm ready."

Castle nodded his head and cleared his throat. He spoke with a deep voice, none like Javier's, but Castle couldn't do anything without just a bit of dramatics. "Hey, Kev."

Ryan blushed, and went to look away from Castle already, but the writer held his chin and turned his head back. He shook his head, signalling Ryan that he had to keep looking. Ryan looked into Castle's eyes again and said, "Javi, there's...there's something I need to tell y-you."

Castle played his part well, "What's up, Kev? Are you okay?" Castle noticed Ryan's confusion at his worry and he briefly stepped out of character, "_What? _We both know if you went up to him like that, his little protective boyfriend instincts would kick in."

Ryan couldn't really deny that and that's when he realized how ridiculous what they were doing was. "Castle-" He rubbed his eyes with the palm of his hands, "This is insane."

Castle waved his hands, "No, no! Ryan, don't stop now. We need to finish our conversation."

Ryan rolled his eyes, but gave in, "Fine, fine. Let's just get this over with before our dinner gets cold in there."

Castle repeated, "What's wrong, Kevin?"

"Javier...I…" He closed his eyes and imagined Javier sitting across from him, "I like you...more than I should...as a partner. And I understand that if you don't feel the same way or if I made this awkward...we could just forget this ever happened." He took a deep breath, "But I love you Javier. I love you so much."

Half of Ryan tricked himself into thinking that he had actually just told his partner his feelings, but Castle's voice reminded him he was just as close to telling Javier how he felt as he was 4 years ago.

"See, Ry, that wasn't so hard." Castle's smile was no longer teasing, but sincere.

Ryan was still blushing and pushed his way out of the car, "Let's just get the food." He didn't wait for Castle before slamming the door shut and heading to the Chinese restaurant doorway.


	4. Chapter 4

That next morning as Castle and Beckett got dressed for work, Castle decided it would be the best time for him to tell Beckett about him and Ryan's conversation. "I did it!" He announced once he finished buttoning his shirt.

Beckett gave him a questioning glance, "Good job, Castle, you know how to dress yourself…" She trailed off in uncertainty as she buttoned up her shirt.

Castle rolled his eyes, "I was talking about Mission: G-R-A-E-T-S-T-C-F-E-O-B-O-U-T-I-N-M-S-T."

Beckett blinked a few times and stared at the writer waiting for him to at least explain, but he just stared at her. "I'm sorry," She shook her head, "Am I supposed to know what the hell that means?"

Castle scoffed, "I guess you don't always pay attention to what I'm telling you, huh?"

Beckett threw Castle's socks harder than needed to him, "When it has a 100 letter acronym, do you really blame me?"

Castle caught his balled up socks just before it nailed him in the face. He sat on their bed to safely dress his feet, "_It means_, Mission: Get Ryan And Esposito Together So They Can Fuck Each Other's Brains Out Until There Is No More Sexual Tension."

This time, Beckett thought it would be better to just slap him on the arm, "You're a pig."

Castle smirked and placed a quick kiss on her cheek, "You'll be thanking me soon enough."

"And how exactly are you going to get 'Ryan and Esposito to fuck each other's brains out'?" Beckett followed Castle out of their bedroom into the kitchen where two steaming cups of coffee were waiting.

"Ryan is going to tell Espo how he feels." Castle said as if it was easy as reciting the alphabet.

Beckett took a sip of her morning brew and nodded, "Oh, that's it." She said with a tinge of sarcasm.

Castle noted her sarcastic demeanor and huffed, "_Yes, that's it. _Why, did you have something else in mind?"

"Castle, you can't expect Ryan to just tell Esposito that he has feelings for him like that. It may take him a few days to get the courage. It's not an easy thing to do." She eyed him as she waited for his response.

"Psh, _I know that, Beckett_," His face wrinkled up as he rolled his eyes, but Beckett just raised her eyebrows at him. "He's already been feeling this for a while, so it's only a matter of time until he tells him."

"You're crazy, Castle. It took us four years and two near death experiences for us to tell each other how we felt. You can't expect that much from him." She grabbed her keys off the small hook and motioned for Castle to follow her out.

Castle did so, but the conversation was not dropped yet, "Exactly. And they've been partners for, what, seven or eight years? I think that's more than enough time."

Beckett and Castle walked down the hall, their shoulders brushing, "Castle, it's different for them."

"Why?"

"You know why, Rick." She said simply as she entered the waiting elevator.

Castle tapped his foot, "What? Because they're both guys? I don't see a problem with it and I know neither do you."

Beckett sighed heavily, "Yes, Castle, but there are more people in this world than just you and me. You should know exactly who I'm talking about, the current case we're in and all."

Castle rolled his eyes, "Oh what, dicks like Stacy and Daniel? They don't matter."

Beckett made sure to lower her voice once they were out of the safety of the elevator, "That won't stop someone for hurting them because of it."

"That's a risk they'll have to take. People want to hurt them already for just doing their jobs. What's the difference?"

Beckett just shook her head as she exited the building to hail down a cabbie. She walked to the edge of the sidewalk and raised her hand watching as a yellow cab slowed to a halt in front of her. Before she slid in, she looked Castle in the eyes and asked, "Just promise me that you won't force him if he's not ready, okay?"

Castle sighed, but agreed, "Okay, but if he needs _just a little push_ don't expect me to just sit there."

* * *

><p>Ryan sat at his desk attempting to finish his work for their last case, but he was mostly just staring at his partner as he actually finished up his paperwork.<p>

He loved when Javier's eyebrows scrunched together just slightly when he was stuck on a part of the form. Sometimes if it was extra frustrating, Ryan would be able to see him bite his lip. Normally, watching your partner fill out paperwork shouldn't make someone so flustered, but as Ryan sat across from Javier watching his eyes track along the pages in front of him nibble on his bottom lip, he couldn't help when he started to feel his blood rush below the belt.

He wasn't half dressed, or giving Ryan 'the eyes', or brushing his hand along Ryan's, or doing anything of the sorts. He was doing his fucking paperwork. And Ryan was hard. _He was turned on by watching his partner fill out his paperwork. _

Javier must have sensed Ryan's staring, so his eyes shifted from his papers to his partner's face. His honey eyes were mixed with concern as he quickly scanned Ryan's face to see if he was alright, "Bro, what's up? You haven't moved for the past 5 minutes."

Ryan's eyes darted from staring directly at Javier's now red bottom lip, to the higher section of his face. He could feel the blush burning his cheeks, "I'm fine. Just thinking."

Javier hesitated a moment before deciding to let Ryan get away with the vague answer, "Alright, then get your work done so I'm not staying late again with you so you can finish your filing."

Ryan looked down at his desk and pretended to start working. He watched his partner from the corner of his eye and waited for him to look back down at his desk before looking up again. As he looked at Javier, the only thing racing through his mind was his conversation with Castle the previous day and how easy it would be to tell him. That way he wouldn't have to secretly lust after his partner and he could be the one making those lips sore.

In that moment, he decided to screw any negative outcomes and throw all his chances on the plate. He pushed himself up from his chair so roughly it tipped over. The sudden bang startled Javier to look up, but Ryan ignored his surprise and kept walking until he was just in front of his partner.

Javier turned his chair around and looked up at Ryan, "What-" But before Javier couldn't finish his sentence, Ryan was grabbing the collar of his shirt and in a second their lips were smashed together. Javier's lips were frozen like his body, so Ryan took the initiative to start their kiss. It was only a second of Ryan leading the kiss before Javier's lips finally joined. Ryan couldn't help but smile into their kiss when he realized _finally he was kissing Javier_.

Suddenly, Ryan felt Javier's tongue run across his bottom lip and he couldn't help the small moan that melted into their kiss. He gripped Javier's shirt tighter and pulled him closer as his hands wrapped around his waist. "_Javi-"_

"Ryan!" Castle's voice snapped him out of his daydream. He blinked his eyes a few times and saw Beckett, Castle and Javier staring at him. "You okay? You dazed off and have been staring at Espo for the past few minutes. You didn't even notice us come in." He gestured to Beckett.

Ryan nodded, not meeting anyone's eyes. He unconsciously lifted a hand to his lips, missing the feel of Javier's lips against his even though the kiss was only a fantasy. _Fantasy_, God, he was an idiot for having a _fantasy _of kissing his best friend in the middle of the precinct. He looked down at his pants to confirm that he was now sporting a fairly noticeable boner that was presently being covered by his desk. Thank God.

"Uh, y-yeah. I'm fine. Just, ah, excuse me." He stuttered before escaping from his desk and rushing towards the bathroom before anyone could notice. He was out of the bullpen and slamming the door to the men's room in a little over a minute.

He stumbled to the sinks with his eyes squeezed shut trying to will his boner away. "Naked Nana. Naked Nana. Naked Nana." He repeated as he gripped the sink tightly. The mess of this was just about enough to bring it down, but imagining his grandmother naked always did the trick.

After he had that _settled, _he let out a deep sigh and flicked the sink on. Cold water rushed from the sink that he used to splash onto his face. Just as the first drop of water his face, Ryan heard the bathroom door open. Afraid that his partner had followed him, Ryan snapped his head towards the door. He heaved a sigh of relief when he saw it was Castle.

"You okay, Ry? Espo was about to come running after you, but I figured it had something to do with our conversation so I told him to stay." Castle made sure to flip the lock behind him.

Ryan didn't pause before going right into his problem, "I just had a _very _realistic dream of me practically pouncing on Javier and attacking his lips in the middle of the precinct, Rick." Ryan rubbed his face with his dry hand. "And he...he kissed me back."

Castle smiled softly, "I told you that you didn't have anything to worry about. He loves you just as much as you love him." He walked over to Ryan's side and patted his shoulder.

Ryan met his smile with his own, "It felt so real, I didn't even know it was a dream."

Castle laughed, "That's good. Dreaming requires your brain, so at least we know you're using your upstairs head just as much as you're using your downstairs one." He looked pointedly at Ryan's crotch.

Ryan blushed and cupped his hands around himself, "I, uh, it's-"

Castle clapped his back loudly with a chuckle, "I was kidding around, Kev." He added with a glint in his eyes, "Well, maybe half kidding."

Ryan rolled his eyes and eased himself from Castle's grip on his shoulder, "I'm gonna tell him. I can't go on feeling like this. He's gotta know." He looked in the mirror to smooth his hair and clean the drips of water from his eyelashes. He turned around and said, "Good?"

Castle nodded his head in approval, "Go get him, tiger."

Ryan nodded confidently and made his way out to the bullpen, ready to confess his love to his partner. And maybe saying that in his head put all of this into perspective and scared him a little, but he was going to go through with this no matter what.

He swallowed back any doubts as he marched over to his partner's desk. Esposito lifted his head when he heard the soft tapping of Ryan's shoes against the hardwood floor.

"You okay, Kev?" Esposito was immediately standing on his feet, heading towards his partner.

Ryan nodded, but didn't responded verbally, "Javi, I need to talk to you in private."

Esposito's eyebrows furrowed, but he didn't question it. "Sure, bro." He was following Ryan back into the break room when Beckett stopped them.

"Boys, that was Lanie...there's another and she said this one we need to see." She flipped her cellphone closed with a thick swallow.

Ryan cursed the timing of that call and sighed, "Let's go, Javi...I'll tell you later."

Esposito hesitated assuming how important this was for Ryan, "You sure? You can me quickly and then we'll head out." He offered.

Ryan didn't even consider the option before shaking his head, "Nah, this case is more important."

Esposito looked him over once more before following Beckett out of the bullpen. Ryan sighed and waited for Castle to catch up before heading towards the elevator.

Castle slowed his jog to a steady walk once he reached Ryan's side. "Sorry, Ryan."

Ryan gave him a small smile, "S'okay, Castle, not your fault. I've waited 7 years already to tell him, I can wait a few more hours."

* * *

><p>"You really had to tell the boys about the call <em>then<em>?" Castle complained on their drive to the crime scene, a worn down apartment building in a dangerous part of town.

Beckett rolled her eyes, "I'm sorry, next time I'll just put our murder cases to the side so those two can wait for their nails to dry."

"He was gonna tell him," Was all Castle said.

Beckett opened her mouth to ask him to be a little more specific, but their early morning conversation came back into mind, "Ryan was going to tell Esposito..._really_?"

Castle nodded his head, "Yup. His little scene earlier was him sorting through everything in his mind. He was literally a minute from telling him after _7 years of waiting_."

"He'll tell him after this, he's waited this long, he'll just have to wait a bit longer."

"That's what he said." Castle grumbled as he looked out the window, glad to be approaching the crime scene. The quicker they got this done, the quicker Ryan could go back to telling Espo how he felt.

"Let's just worry about your psycho fan right now." She said as she pulled up behind a flashing police car. "We can only deal with one problem at a time."

Castle followed her out of the car to the apartment building and they headed up to the fourth floor where a closed off section of the hall was waiting with a new aunt from their mysterious psycho. They got to the apartment with no trouble; it wasn't that difficult to find the only one surrounding by medical examiners and the NYPD.

Beckett lifted the yellow police tape so her and Castle could duck underneath. The moment they stepped into the overcrowded living room, Castle and Beckett felt the entire room's eyes on them.

Castle leaned down to whisper in Beckett's ear, "I didn't forget my pants again, right?"

Beckett checked down and shook her head, "Nope,"

"So why is everyone staring…" Castle wondered as hushed whispers joined the staring.

"They're probably not used to seeing a monkey out of it's cage and walking around New York. You forget you're not in the zoo anymore." Esposito piped in from the back.

Castle turned around, startled, "I didn't hear you guys come up behind us."

Esposito rolled his eyes and jabbed his thumb towards his partner, "This doofus is trying out some new exercise routine and is taking the stairs everywhere. I figured I'd keep him company during his self inflicted torture."

Ryan scoffed, "It's good for the legs…" His argument trailed off when he noticed the staring and whispering as well. "What did you do now Castle?" He asked the writer who looked appalled.

"Why are you assuming it's because of me?" He tuned around to face the Irishman.

"Who else's fault would it be?" Esposito shrugged his shoulders.

Lanie chose that moment to join the four, "I know why they're staring and whispering and it's not because of Castle."

Castle smirked and shoved Esposito and Ryan lightly, "Ha! See? Not my fault!"

"But I wish it was just something stupid Castle did." Lanie sighed looking at Esposito and Ryan.

"Why?" Ryan asked hesitantly, sensing something was wrong.

"You haven't seen the bodies yet." She stated, more than asked.

Beckett gulped, "Bodies? More than one person was killed?"

Lanie nodded shortly and waved towards the bedroom door, "They're on the bed...just before you go in, a little warning; it's a little _uncomfortable._"

The four exchanged uneasy glances before Beckett cleared her throat, "Show us what you got, Lanie."

Lanie opened her mouth and hesitated like she wanted to say something, but in the end decided against it and sighed before ushering them inside the small bedroom. There were flashes from cameras and other detectives blocking the bodies, so Lanie filled them in while they waited for the room to clear out.

"We believe they've been here since some time last night, but they were the killer's hands maybe a few days by looking at the bruises and such. COD is the beatings and bleeding to death, it definitely wasn't a painless way to go."

The three people in front of the five of them finally noticed they were waiting and stepped away. The younger officer out of the three went pastly white when his eyes landed on Ryan and Esposito. He swallowed thickly and quickly turned his head away.

Neither noticed, as they were too busy trying to see for themselves just what all of the commotion was about.

They got their answer when they saw the two bodies in the bloody bed.

Beckett couldn't hold back the gasp as her hand flew to her mouth. "Holy shit."

Castle rubbed his eyes multiple times to check and see if what was in front of him was real. "This is fifty shades of fucked up."

Ryan and Esposito remained quiet as they stared at the two naked men in front of them. They were lying shoulder to shoulder, with one hand cupping the other's crotch to keep some of their dignity. Not really though.

First off, they were naked and beaten leaving hardly any unscathed skin to the eye. Only to add to it all, their hands were laying on the other man's member. They weren't even covering themselves, rather covering _each other. _Assumedly, it was most likely set up like that by the killer.

But the most horrific part of the scene was that they looked _exactly _like Ryan and Esposito.


End file.
